As July unfolds, Reader, mid-year review season is in full swing—and I notice my coaching clients feeling the weight of both giving feedback and bracing themselves to receive it.

Because sometimes, you know you've got to say hard things to good people. You can't put it off any longer.

And sometimes, people have to say hard things to US (gulp).

It just happened to my new-ish client T (I'll withhold her name for her privacy).

T invested in professional coaching after she realized the advice and frameworks she'd been following for so long no longer worked for her elevated role and the demands of her life.

She was leading a complex, multi-department project for her company. In an effort to stay on a strict timeline and drive progress, her harsh words and behaviors demotivated her teams, insulted peers, and made vendors less responsive to her requests.

In short, she got called a bully. Ouch.

So when it came time for her mid-year review last week with her EVP, she wasn't surprised to hear all her mistakes played back to her.  🎥

But it felt brutal.

"I completely expected it," T told me. "I've made improvements, but they're not showing up yet. What do I do NOW that I've gotten the negative feedback officially?"

Here's the truth. Getting real input and observations on your actions is . . . just data.

That's it. It's not your personal failing, or a tragedy, or the end of your illustrious career (unless of course, you fail to do anything about it. 😇)

Time and time again, I find that we're always better off having the honest data laid out in front of us sooner, rather than having it lurk quietly in the background, waiting to spring up and attack us at any time.

So T and I walked through my three power moves to take when you get negative feedback at work. These don't need to happen instantly during a review; in fact, most are better used as recovery strategies afterward.

For her, the most important one was step 3: follow-up and apologize if needed. My suggested script went something like this:

"Hey, I really heard what you shared about bullying the team and our vendors. I've dug a little deeper, and I completely see what you're saying. I want to thank you for telling me about it. I apologize that my actions have been seen that way---it was never my intent for anyone to feel bullied. I want to tell you about a couple of things I'm doing to get better, including how I'm working with an executive coach, and I'd like to ask for your help to catch me when I slip into old habits. Are you game?"

You can read more here:

​What to Do When You Get Negative Feedback at Work: Three Power Moves​

So how 'bout you, Reader? Have you ever received negative feedback at work? Hit REPLY and tell me about how you responded. I always love hearing from you.

​(Oh, and if this is happening to you right now during mid-year review season, my article also includes scripts for what to do and say when you don't feel the feedback is fair or accurate. 😇)

July's not too late to hit reset and change what's not working for us in our lives at work. And of course, I'm always here to help when you hit a bumpy patch like T did. You can schedule a consult here, with no cost and no obligation. Talk soon--keep soaring!

Always, Darcy

​

P.S. The blog MoneyLion recently asked for my views on how to make your career AI-proof. You can read this quick piece here, and I've written about this general idea pre-AI in more detail here. Let me know what questions YOU have about your career future in a changing world--I always love answering them!

Also, I am enjoying the perspective of independent news source 1440, and they're kind of enough to offer to sponsor today's newsletter. If you're trying to keep up without getting down, it's worth checking out: